Do you have a cellphone?

  No, its treif.
  Yes, but without internet.
  Yes with internet.
  Yes, how else can I listen to the daily?

Do you watch Netflix?

  No.
  Alot, but I don’t own a tv.
  Yes, both on tv and my laptop
  Yes, I like their collection of POC produced films

Did you primarily attend modern orthodox institutions?

  No.
  Yes, but my kids won’t
  Yes, and my kids will.
  Yes, but I don’t like that they taught me to support Israel unquestionably

How often do you use the term compound interest during davening?

  Im too busy davening that my family has food for the week
  Often
  I’d rather talk football
  Never, I’m too busy reading Moshe Lichtenstein’s article explaining that bestiality is prohibited, but only because you’re doing it with the wrong intentions

Do you believe that Judaism requires material self sacrifice?

  Yes, I live in a 2 bedroom house with 10 kids.
  Yes, that’s why I only will go on non-gebrokhts pesach programs
  Yes, but it’s not a mitzvah to be uncomfortable.
  No, deracheha darchei noam vchol netivoteha shalom.

Do you daven with a minyan 3 times a day?

  Of course.
  No

___ Soloveitchik

  Yitzchak Zev Soloveitchik
  Yesha Ber Soloveitchik
  Meir Soloveitchik
  Peter Solevey

What bracha do you make on scotch in a sherry cask?

  Its treif
  Shehakol
  Drinking alcohol is assur
  My self care therapist told me to stop drinking

What do you primarily daven for?

  Yiras shamayim
  Parnasa
  The medina
  Endangered species